中考英語書面表達優(yōu)秀范文賞析

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新華中學(xué) 周易

　　中考即將到來的時刻，英語復(fù)習(xí)應(yīng)更多地集中在中、難度題型的練習(xí)上，今天和同學(xué)們談?wù)剷姹磉_這個題型。寫作是英語綜合能力的形式，這個形式體現(xiàn)學(xué)生本人的詞匯量大小；單詞、詞組和句子的運用能力及邏輯思維能力。下面就一個有關(guān)鍛煉身體的話題和一封寫給父母的信，從構(gòu)思、文章結(jié)構(gòu)到寫作的方法來看如何完成這樣的書面表達。

　　例1：

　　隨著陽光體育運動在全國開展，政府對中學(xué)生身體素質(zhì)有所下降這個問題給予了高度重視，提出了這樣的標語：“EXERCISE ONE HOUR A DAY, KEEP ILLNESS AWAY”。同學(xué)們參加了各種體育鍛煉之后，校園里出現(xiàn)了可喜的變化，強身健體，增強了學(xué)習(xí)效果，校園生活豐富了。請你報道一下學(xué)校開展這一活動的情況。

　　注意：1. 詞數(shù)80—100左右。

　　2. 要求文章結(jié)構(gòu)合理、內(nèi)容通順、句子連貫。

　　參考詞匯：build up one’s body strength 強健身體

　　reduce diseases 減少疾病

　　構(gòu)思方法：

　　1.認真閱讀、理解和思考題目中給出的所有信息點。信息點是圍繞著提示從文字中扣出來的。

　　2.這個題目的信息點應(yīng)該是：

　　a.陽光體育；

　　b.政府重視中學(xué)生身體；

　　c.提出的標語；

　　d.參加了各種體育鍛煉；

　　e.有利于強身健體；

　　f.增強了學(xué)習(xí)效果；

　　g.校園生活豐富了。

　　寫作方法：

　　1.安排以上信息點在文中的邏輯關(guān)系。

　　2.用所掌握的詞匯、詞組、固定句型將所有信息點表現(xiàn)在文章中。(the Sunny Sports, pay attention to the health of the students, raise the slogan, take part in the exercise, build up one’s body strength, reduce diseases, make study effective, school life, colourful)

　　3.文章最后加入個人評價(觀點)。

　　下面是學(xué)生的作文：

　　(1)

　　As the Sunny Sports is developing in our country, the government has paid attention to the health of the students and raised, "EXERCISE ONE HOUR A DAY, KEEP ILLNESS AWAY". So far our school life has changed a lot. Now we have more time to do sport in the morning or after school. We play football, basketball, badminton and swim. They let our brains relax and make our school life more colorful. We have become more energetic. Above all our study has all been improved.

　　Let’s take exercise every day. It can build up our body strength and reduce diseases.

　　(2)

　　Doing sport builds up our body strength and reduces diseases.

　　Though we lead a better life, our health is becoming worse now. So "EXERCISE ONE HOUR A DAY，KEEP ILLNESS AWAY" has been raised by the government.

　　At noon or after school we play ball games, swimming and running. Look!The playground seems smaller because lots of students are playing on it.The school life has become colorful and we are energetic.As a result we study harder and better.

　　The Sunny Sports has brought an exciting change to us. Let’s keep on doing it.

　　這是兩個學(xué)生的習(xí)作，他們分別以獨特的思路和風(fēng)格，利用豐富的詞匯、準確的時態(tài)、簡單句和復(fù)合句的搭配、合理的構(gòu)思使文章語言流利，一氣呵成，展現(xiàn)了扎實的英語語法功底和綜合運用能力。

　　例2：

　　健康對于我們每個人來說是非常重要的，但你的父母天天忙于工作而忽略了這個問題，你很為他們擔(dān)憂。請你以此為話題，并結(jié)合提示給他們寫一封信。

　　提示：1.要走路去上班，而不是開車或坐車；

　　2.每周至少去體育館鍛煉一次，或打球、或游泳；

　　3.飲食要健康；

　　4.不要工作太晚，要早休息。

　　要求：1.短文結(jié)構(gòu)完整，意思連貫，語言流暢，語法準確，符合邏輯；

　　2.80—100詞左右；

　　3.開頭和結(jié)尾部分已給出，不計入總詞數(shù)。

　　構(gòu)思方法：

　　1.找到信息點。

　　2.這個題目的信息點應(yīng)該是：

　　a.作為兒(女)擔(dān)憂父(母)的身體狀況；

　　b.上班最好步行；

　　c.每周至少一次到體育場館從事體育鍛煉(球類運動、游泳等)；

　　d.健康的飲食；

　　e.早睡不熬夜。

　　寫作方法：

　　1.首先要談到對父(母)的身體狀況擔(dān)憂。

　　2.然后引出希望父(母)怎么做。

　　3.作為小輩向父母提出建議和要求時，要注意語氣，不可以命令。

　　4.注意信的寫作格式。

　　學(xué)生的作文：

　　(1)

　　Dear Dad(Mum),

　　You’re so busy every day that you don’t pay much attention to your health. I’m worried about your health all the time. I’d like to give you some suggestions. I hear walking is the best sport. Your company isn’t far from home, is it? Why not walk to the office? You’d better take exercise at least once a week, such as playing tennis in the gym. Going to swim is also a nice choice, too. What’s more, it’s necessary to have healthy food. Try not to stay up too late. Having enough sleep can help your brain work better.

　　Dad, please accept my advice. I really wish you healthy!

　　Your loving son (daughter)

　　Tom (Mary)

　　(2)

　　Dear Dad(Mum),

　　You’re so busy every day that you don’t pay much attention to your health.I am worried about you. I hope you can keep healthy. You often drive to your office. It is not far.What about walking there because it can make you much stronger?I’d like you to play basketball or go swimming in the gym at least once a week. It is important to eat healthy food such as vegetables, meat, eggs and fruits. Though your work is hard, I still hope that you can go to bed early so that you can get enough sleep.

　　I’m looking forward to receiving your letter.

　　Your loving son (daughter)

　　Tom (Mary)

　　這兩篇作文使用了I’d like to…，Why not…?It is important to do…,Try not to do…,I hope that…,What about doing…?I’d like you to do…,You’d better do…等婉轉(zhuǎn)口氣的請求句式，表達出了作者對父(母)的關(guān)心，信息點完整，內(nèi)容充實，注重了書信的結(jié)尾形式。

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